Carole is available for bi-coastal house calls, speaking engagements anywhere, phone consults nationally and internationally. She also sees patients by appointment at Westside Veterinary Center in Manhattan. Her latest book is The Complete Guide To Understanding And Caring For Your Cat. Her recently released CD of spoken cat advice and soothing music is Caring For Your Cat, The Wilbourn Way.
Come back to Carole's home page monthly for cat news and Carole's most recent replies to behavior inquiries from worried cat guardians. To have this home page emailed to you after the story update, click here. You will receive this exact page by email, and it will link you to the other pages in her site, and to the rest of the IDA web site.
THE WILBOURN WAY (AKA Cats on the Couch)
April 2012
THE MESSAGE IS IN THE SUBTEXT
TELLTALE TAIL
My Orion is in the midst of a play date with Bug, a rescued Pug, who lives next door. Notice he's on the run. If he's being chased, you wonder why his tail is joyfully swirled-the telltale sign of a happy cat. That's elementary. Orion loves to be pursued by seasoned females in the know. They rock!
NEW CAT BED TRIGGERS ANGST
Hi Carole,
I think you'll remember Benny. You helped with his introduction to my two cats. (Refer to Testimonials above.) I'm happy to report all is going well. There was a slight problem that I quickly rectified. My Misha and Pasha sleep with me, while Benny doses in the bathroom. I decided to surprise Benny with a new cat bed, and the next day Benny was shunned and hissed at. Fortunately, I remembered something you emphasized: "Keep your three guys in the loop to avoid angst." I quickly realized that the cat bed was the cause. So now my three boys each have their very own cat bed, and Benny is no longer the odd cat out.
Susan,
N.Y.C.
Hi Guardian Susan,
It's super that you spread the wealth, and Benny is no longer the scapecat. Good going!
A PURR TURNS TO BITES AND SCRATCHES (Overstimulated)
Hi Carole,
Every now and again, when I pet my cat Sashé he bites or scratches me out of the blue. What would make a purr turn to a tussle so quickly and without provocation? I thought he liked me.
Thanks,
Kip,
Florida
Hi Guardian Kip,
Hey, now, he's not dissing you. What happens is that Sashé becomes over-stimulated/over-aroused by your touch and reacts with a whammy. Kip, STOP before he STARTS. Don’t wait for him to call the shots. A little affection can go a long way. Less can be more. A ripple of his back, a flick of his tail may be his signal for you to stop. That's a sign of his current "acceptance level."
Also, a purring cat is not always a happy cat. Sometimes a cat will purr when he's fearful or anxious. As his energy builds, his "purr mechanism" is activated. Kip, Saché is always talking to you, with his body language-a silent meow.
SINKING OF THE TITANIC AND THE AGE BEFORE SPAY AND NEUTER
A guardian recently told me the following anecdote about a cat who survived the voyage of the Titanic:
"It seemed that the crew often had at least one cat on board each ship to help keep the rat population down. It's said that there was a cat with young kittens aboard the sea trials of the Titanic but when the ship arrived in Southampton from Belfast, she was seen de-shipping. Up and down the gangplank she went, retrieving one kitten at a time whom she deposited on the dock. She and the kittens quickly disappeared. It was later said that she had some sort of premonition that the voyage wasn't going to be a good one."
CAT SENSE
I like to refer to this courageous and prescient cat's behavior as "cat sense." My feeling is that cats are natural mediums for fluctuations in surrounding energy fields-both human and nonhuman. So it's possible that when this alleged cat felt some disruptive changes, she jumped ship with her babies.
NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC MAGAZINE - CATS & DOGS
I was recently quoted in an article "Cats, Man's Other Best Friends," by Cathy Newman:
"So what is it about cats? I asked cat therapist Carole Wilbourn, who started her practice in Manhattan as a cat shrink 40 years ago. In reply, she reminisced about cats she has been guardian for (she prefers "guardian" to "owner") and the companionship they provided through difficult times... What is it about cats? We stare at each other for a moment. Wilbourn looks as if she might cry. "They're always there for you," she says."
Now I'd like to tell you why I prefer "guardian" to "owner."
WHY I CHOOSE GUARDIAN
You can live with a cat, but you don't "own" the cat. No, you can't own a cat. For as long as I can remember, I never used the word "owner" in relation to a cat (or any other animal companion). In my first book (1976) and various articles, I used the terms "caregiver" or cat's "person." You can live with a cat, but you can never actually "own" a cat. A cat, like other animal companions, is a living being with a rich emotional life, and not inanimate, like a piece of property that can be disposed of or sold at will.
I have always found that language is key when we are defining something, particularly, a relationship. What we say becomes how we feel and, thus, act. It is also becomes how we characterize or limit that relationship. When the word "owner" is used to define a relationship with a cat or other individual animal, we could just as easily be referring to a house, car, or any other piece of property. Disposable becomes the common denominator or link. There is no expression of love or respect. We have to think love and respect to be able to express them.
Several years ago I read an article in the New York Times about a veterinarian in Northern California who used the word "guardian" to recognize animals as individuals. The idea of guardian truly resonated with me as it embodies a solid and compassionate relationship with one’s animal companion. I realized that the veterinarian, Dr. Elliot Katz, was someone whom I had known when he lived on the East Coast, and he was now founder and president of In Defense Of Animals, an international animal-protection organization. I was thrilled and proud that he was leading a movement, where one of the many goals was to embrace our beloved companions as part of the family. “Guardian” soon became my expression of choice. When Dr. Katz asked me to write an online column on cat behavior, I was both honored and privileged to become part of an organization so worthy and actively instrumental in treating animals as individuals. I know you, too, will agree with how important it is to help incorporate the term “guardian” into your everyday language. You can educate your family, friends, and community to understand and embrace the "guardian" principle. Make your city a Guardian City. Click on to idausa.org for more information.
Thank you, guardians.
EQUAL OPPORTUNITY IN THE WHITE HOUSE
(Orion, a former rescue, will represent cats and offer nuggets of wisdom regarding Bo, the rescued First Dog—a Portuguese Water Dog.)
CRUELTY-FREE
Orion wants to enroll Bo to be the poster dog for cosmetics and household products that are free of animal testing. Go Bo!
QUESTIONS TO CAROLE
Please consult with your veterinarian first to make certain that your animal companion's problem is not due to any medical condition.
If you have a question for Carole, you can email her at thecattherapist@idausa.org. We're sorry that Carole won't be able to answer all questions, but the answers to many questions can be found in her IDA archives.
Oscar the Cat Predicts Death
Oscar is the feline resident at a nursing home in Providence, Rhode Island who seems to have predicted the deaths of 25 of the residents. In case after case, when he has curled up next to someone, it usually means they have less than four hours of life left. I was interviewed about Oscar by NBC-TV. Read all about Oscar on their site. To watch my video, click here.
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